Tiger, Tiger burning out – Another lie in the rough
Dear Tiger Woods,
Congratulations on smashing up your car for the fourth time since 2009! I have friends who haven't so much as had a fender-bender in 30 years of driving. Then again, I have other fr...
Property prayers answered for some
I should probably be writing about the steamy three-way that's going on in the Middle East, but there are times when those of us who live in civilised nations need to avert their eyes when the more pr...
Willie or Won’t He? Conservation through the barrel of a gun
Dear Comrade Minister Willie Aucamp,
Congratulations! You have barely had time to settle into your well-padded ergonomically designed executive office chair and have already put out a hit on at least...
Durban roars into the top 20
https://www.patreon.com/posts/durban-makes-it-150130735
Looking for a sign in 2026? Try checking Uranus
After a close encounter with a celestial body on New Year’s Eve, I had an epiphany so powerful that I had to go home and change my broeks. It was downhill from then on.
All indications are that 202...
Dastardly Donald wins again
Dear President Donald Trump, Master of the Universe, Lord of every creeping thing that creepeth, flying thing that flyeth and fishy thing that swimmeth,
Congratulations on your spectacular acquisitio...
Oh, to be in Bethlehem on this auspicious day
To wake to the sound of church bells and the distant crump of mortars landing in Gaza.
To see the early morning sky light up as Israeli helicopter gunships unleash their missiles.
To smell the tearg...
Mayhem at the mall
All that is preventing hostilities from breaking out in shopping mall parking lots across the country are the Congolese and Rwandan car guards. They have seen some terrible things, and I’m not even ta...
Xmas shopping for the lazy and the drunk
Christmas is around the corner and you still haven't bought presents and you'd rather pour superglue into your ears than go to a mall. I am here to save you. Giving someone one of my ebooks means no w...
Empty nest syndrome is to be welcomed, not feared
Exams are done, and, for some, school's out forever. The kids will soon be moving on. Here are some tips to help stop them from moving back in.
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Once they have graduated and their...
Shoprite, Sho’t Left, Gone in 60 Minutes
Dear Pieter Engelbrecht,
Congratulations on taking home R7.2 million a month. I applaud your restraint. If I were the CEO of Shoprite and had the only keys to the safe, I'd take home a lot more. I'd ...
Boers vs Cape Dutch: Trump can’t add but he can divide
Donald Trump has managed to create the biggest split among Afrikaners since the Voortrekkers abandoned the Cape Colony, leaving behind their more refined Dutch compatriots who had grown to enjoy their...