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~ the literary equivalent of sex with a clown ~

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~ the literary equivalent of sex with a clown ~

11 May
Cut&Run

Good news for pangolins – bad news for Chinese knobs

  • May 11, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 0 comments
China has said it will remove Guilingji, a traditional medicine containing bits of pangolin, from its official 2025 pharmacopoeia. I don't know what a pharmacopoeia is, but I imagine it's some kind of...

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07 May
Columns

Vote Ben II for the next pope

  • May 7, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 0 comments
Dear Comrade Cardinals, I love Catholics. I am about as Catholic as you can get without actually being Catholic. I almost became one a few years ago but my wife wouldn’t let me join the line for bisc...

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03 May
Cut&Run

Cyril vs Donald – A meeting from hell

  • May 3, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 2 comments
A Sunday paper reported that Donald Trump has agreed to meet Cyril Ramaphosa face to face. Here's a preview of what to expect. Ten minutes before the meeting, the two men discuss arrangements with th...

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21 Apr
Columns

Goodbye, Mr Pope

  • April 21, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 2 comments
So Pope Francis died today, possibly as a consequence of meeting JD Vance yesterday. To remember him, here's a letter I wrote a few years ago: ............................. Dear Comrade Pope, You...

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20 Apr
Cut&Run

An open letter to Mcebisi Jonas, Special Envoy to the Home of the Braindead

  • April 20, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 2 comments
Dear Mcebisi, I hear you're going to be our new man in Washington. Reward or punishment? Hard to say. Anyway, its always nice to get a lucrative side hustle, even if it is in a country that is fast t...

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18 Apr
Columns

When Good Friday turned bad

  • April 18, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 2 comments
In accordance with my annual tradition, I'm republishing a column I wrote some years ago. ................. I was making an emergency house call on the bad yellow-eyed woman when I stumbled across a...

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27 Mar
Cut&Run

Application for the post of ambassador to the US

  • March 27, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 11 comments
To whom it may concern: Perhaps not the best way to start an application letter for a post in the diplomatic corps, or anywhere in government for that matter. There's a good chance no one in the civi...

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20 Mar
Columns

Durban’s Mitchell Park – RIP

  • March 20, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 31 comments
I remember going to Durban's Mitchell Park as a kid. It was fantastic. Huge trees, rolling lawns, exotic birds and animals in enclosures – even an elephant and a crocodile that never seemed to move– a...

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14 Mar
Cut&Run

Fear and loathing in the Drunkensberg…

  • March 14, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 0 comments
I should be writing about something serious like the finance minister's latest distribution of our hard-earned money among the salivating hyenas, but I can't, because I'm trapped in the Drunkensberg. ...

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09 Feb
Columns

Kallie Kriel – chief beneficiary of the Dunning-Kruger Effect

  • February 9, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 1 comment
Here's something I wrote to AfriForum's Kallie Kriel almost seven years ago. The poor oke has been at this for a long time... .................. Hello Oom Kallie. How is it going with Oom? Is it...

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30 Jan
Columns

In the war between beer and nature, beer will always win

  • January 30, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 0 comments
One from the archives.... ................... Why am I being badgered by bearded women demanding that I vote for Table Mountain? The last time I voted for anything was in 1994, and look where th...

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30 Jan
Columns

Snakes and adders – A devil of a game

  • January 30, 2025
  • By author-avatar Ben Trovato
  • 0 comments
I caught a snake on my eleventh birthday. Not one of those scary big-ass mothers that can squeeze you to death and swallow you whole. I didn’t grow up in the Amazon jungle, even though my table manner...

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Recent Posts

  • Good news for pangolins – bad news for Chinese knobs
    May 11, 2025
  • Vote Ben II for the next pope
    May 7, 2025
  • Cyril vs Donald – A meeting from hell
    May 3, 2025
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