11
May
Good news for pangolins – bad news for Chinese knobs
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By
Ben Trovato
China has said it will remove Guilingji, a traditional medicine containing bits of pangolin, from its official 2025 pharmacopoeia. I don't know what a pharmacopoeia is, but I imagine it's some kind of...
03
May
Cyril vs Donald – A meeting from hell
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By
A Sunday paper reported that Donald Trump has agreed to meet Cyril Ramaphosa face to face. Here's a preview of what to expect.
Ten minutes before the meeting, the two men discuss arrangements with th...
20
Apr
An open letter to Mcebisi Jonas, Special Envoy to the Home of the Braindead
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By
Dear Mcebisi,
I hear you're going to be our new man in Washington. Reward or punishment? Hard to say. Anyway, its always nice to get a lucrative side hustle, even if it is in a country that is fast t...
27
Mar
Application for the post of ambassador to the US
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By
To whom it may concern:
Perhaps not the best way to start an application letter for a post in the diplomatic corps, or anywhere in government for that matter. There's a good chance no one in the civi...
14
Mar
Fear and loathing in the Drunkensberg…
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By
I should be writing about something serious like the finance minister's latest distribution of our hard-earned money among the salivating hyenas, but I can't, because I'm trapped in the Drunkensberg. ...
15
Dec
Letters to Santa…
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By
Cyril Ramaphosa: Dear Santa, I have been good this year. On the other hand, perhaps I haven't. It is hard to say. I am applying my mind and will let you know in due course. As a fan of your work, I am...
02
Nov
Rachel’s red card for Kolisi
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By
Dear Siya,
Congratulations on the impending severance of your matrimonial bonds. Too many people talk about divorce as if it's a bad thing. They have no idea. The happiest day of my life was when I g...
10
Oct
Arise, Sir Ben …
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By
It's been some time since I left school. Not quite in disgrace, but not exactly covered in glory either. Did my school “career” leave a lasting impression on me? Sure it did, but only until the flesh ...
03
Oct
Crystal clear on race
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By
I read something written by someone who has something to do with the so-called Institute of Race Relations.
I’ve heard things about this institute. I don’t know if these things are true.
To be h...
08
Sep
Roman around the farms
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By
Dear John,
Oh dear. That's unfortunate phrasing. Perhaps Mr Steenhuisen would be less triggering. Did you ever get a Dear John letter from a duplicitous girlfriend while you were in the army? Were yo...
29
Aug
We demand more pot
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By
I've been hearing a lot about this two-pot retirement system lately. It all happens on Sunday. That should liven up the weekend. Better than getting stabbed. People who know things say it's a brillian...
23
Aug
A Floydian Slip
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By
Dear Julius,
I was sorry to hear about your break-up with Floyd. The collapse of a relationship is no laughing matter. Actually, that's not true. When my second marriage ended I laughed for days. B...