34 thoughts on “Burn, baby, burn!

  1. Jane says:

    Yes I do realise what you are saying Albert Jack and have lost various relatives through a motley selection of grotesque tortures who didn’t quite fit the religious conformity of the day, I am interested that you live at the Vatican City but not surprised necessarily – Im no longer fooled by old systems of controlling gullible humans and I will look out for your book. Ben is a brilliant thinker and writer and Im interested to know if you match him. Always like to be made to think. Jane

    1. Jane says:

      I think albertjackchat.com answered my own question – undoubtedly (sorry Ben no offence you are still my fav) “Last Man in London’ is my pick or “Shaggy Dogs and Black Sheep”. Hopefully something will emanate from your prostrations at the Vatican and will find its way to your blog. Jane

  2. Craig says:

    The three letter writers all have one thing in common: they take themselves too seriously. Believe what you like but please don’t elevate your beliefs to anything anyone else need observe in any shape or form. If Ben offends you, don’t read his column. That’s not too intricate is it! Go Ben!

  3. amandzing says:

    If God is “literally” laughing, why is everyone being so pissy?

  4. john metelerkamp says:

    i have one pair of hardly used 1200* fire-resistant gloves for you. at least you can then continue writing. i am sure that Vodacom has comms in Hell

    1. If I’m going to hell, I won’t be needing my hands for writing.

  5. Daemonchocolatebunnyeater says:

    We all go to heaven as it must be hell to spend eternity with believers in such claptrap.

  6. 3rdearmusichiddenyearsarchive says:

    Bless You Ben. Jesus Christ, sorry – didn’t mean to curse – Yeshua Ben Yosef, the Nazareen (he was never known as JC back then) was also crucified & suffered terribly for believing in what he said. (What’s worse? Healing the holes in your hand or your head?)

    1. He was also called Ben? Cool.

  7. Abramowitz says:

    See you theredon’t forget the rizlas

    Date: Sun, 29 Mar 2015 14:38:55 +0000 To: abramowitz@hotmail.co.nz

    1. I’ll bring the nonflammable rizlas. The joints will last longer that way.

  8. Peter Chipps says:

    It’s not that you’re going to hell. It’s the Christians who WANT you to go to hell.

    Sent from my iPhone


  9. curtisr190@gmail.com says:


    Can I join you? Expected that diatribe from the mother grundies really pathetic.

    Keep up the good work.

    Bob Curtis

    Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

    1. Sure. Everyone’s welcome. Well, everyone except Steve Hofmeyr.

  10. Trovato, I think this time you have gone too far. It is ok to mock the ANC on a weekly basis because they are too stupid to understand you and so it doesn’t matter. But decent, humble Christians are far too intellectual for the likes of you. As the dear lady De Cock says, we will indeed have no chocolate crosses!

    In support of sister Christine I also, publicly, challenge you to discover the exact reason why, and time when Jesus’s death and resurrection is remembered and celebrated. Because then, my heathen friend, you will learn that to some questions there are no answers. Even questions that make no fucking sense at all. There, make sense of that, devil child.

    Psalm 20 something may well say that The Lord laughs at those who challenge him. Well, I have some Palms of my own, sonny boy. Palm 1:1 in the book of James’s son clearly says that anybody who laughs at intelligent, right minded people who have outgrown medieval superstitions and pedophile priests will indeed get what is coming to them. Just as your day will come too Trovato. You remember what the Shaka Rocker told you, your day will come. And when it does you know where to find me – in Hell, down by the vomitorium, with Caligula. No nailing me to a tree with a hatful of thorns for eternity, thank you very much.

    I’m with Jane. If all those fanatics who are burning pilots and going around beheading good men are anything to go by then I also sincerely hope you are our biggest problem. Like all good sisters, Jane clearly knows what matters. I thank her for pointing this out because otherwise I would have thought it was the maniacs burning pilots and beheading good men who were the problem. Thanks to Jane I now realise it is the likes of you, laughing at chocolate rabbits, who are the real danger we face.

    In Bangkok I know a Jesus who will indeed pull you to his merciful chest and forgive you your sins. Please don’t be flippant about Jesus Chris again, ever. I am warning you, Christians were not put on God’s earth to be mocked.

    Bring back the collusuim.

    1. Jane says:

      Thanks for noticing that I simply transferred the ‘blame’ to the pilot burning maniacs in the best of religious intentions. It reminds me of Jung’s quote ‘what I do unto the least of my brethren that i do unto Christ. But what if I should discover that the least among them all, the poorest of all the beggars, the most impudent of all the offenders – the very enemy himself – that these are within me and that I myself stand in need of the alms of my own kindness – that I myself am the enemy who must be loved – what then?” But while the enemy remains our neighbour, the taxi driver, the president, the terrorist maniacs, the young, anyone who looks different to me – nothing will change. I dont judge “Jesus Chris” and his enlightened being but the insanity ofus humans make it really difficult. I agree the collusuim is the answer. Jane

      1. Albert Jack says:

        Jane, I was mocking Christians and the nonsense rhetoric being used in almost every line I read. There will be no chocolate crosses? Those who mock Jesus will come off second best? Clearly he is not a Christian!

        Bring back the Coliseum,…? You do know that was where many of your distant elders were eaten by lions don’t you.. (And you don’t really think I live in the Vatican?)

        Headline – Easter tirade mocking our beliefs showed disrespect..? I don’t think Ben went nearly far enough in his article. You wait until you read my next book, Beware False Prophets.

    2. marc Potgieter says:

      Albert, I am too tired to get into an argument about religion but saying… It is ok to mock the ANC on a weekly basis because they are too stupid to understand”… but then are Christians also too stupid for believing that a MAN who walked around saying things and healing… like these so called faith healers… then put up to dry on a wooden cross, die then three days later come alive then poof vanish into the clouds… Sheeple…

      Ben, I LOVE your humor and would have loved to be taught by you as a kid. Dont back down, EVER from what you believe.

      1. Albert Jack says:

        Marc, do me a favour and read it again will you…? The Book of James’s Son…Really.?

      2. I didn’t teach much as a kid, to be honest. I was too busy robbing the sweet shop.

    3. Sorry I offended you, Albert. The last thing I would want to do is distract you from your ascetic life of solitude and celibacy in that most holy of cities, Bangkok.

      1. Albert Jack says:

        Indeed. I am prostrate as we speak..

    4. The Book of James’s Son – would that be the 18 year old?

      1. Albert Jack says:

        It would be yes. I stole it from a man who will be dead come Easter Sunday if he carries on like he is. Nailed to some chocolate.

  11. Val Miller says:

    Ja well!


    Yes, Ben, will gladly join you there. Just hope I can bring you an Easter Bunny which won’t melt in those eternal flames. Groete till then, Piet.

    1. Never mind the Easter eggs, Piet. Maybe bring some water.

  13. ginnyswart says:

    There’s always someone with a gripe! Usually someone with no sense of humour. Try not to be too dismayed or cast down

    1. Dismayed? It’s people like these that keep me going.

  14. granny1947 says:

    See you there…I don’t want to go anywhere where there is no sense of humour!!!

  15. Jane says:

    I think you will but then somewhere in the bible it speaks of our being surprised when the time comes who will in fact enter into the Kingdom of Heaven. I think our sweet Jesus would pull you to his merciful chest and forgive you. In the scheme of things I would hope that Jesus would love you and not waste time on being offended which is just the ego anyway and that you are the least of our concerns if the fanatics who burned that poor Jordanian pilot alive and beheaded numerous good men are anything to go by. Let’s pray you are our biggest problem. Jane

    1. I am, indeed, my biggest problem.

      1. Jane says:

        Aren’t we all our own biggest problems – just a question of putting one foot in front of the other and keep breathing on the road to …. ?? – well maybe i speak for myself. As granny1947 says a sense of humour is key – in fact they say 15 mins of bellyaching laughter a day will keep us healthy. Trouble is people look at me squiff when i walk down the street. Jane

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